I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I... - Mark Twain

"Herodotus says, "Very few things happen at the right time, and the rest do not happen at all: the conscientious historian will correct these defects."

"Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."

"It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."

"The secret to getting ahead is getting started."

"In religion and politics people’s beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without examination, from authorities who have not themselves examined the questions at issue but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, whose opinions about them were not worth a brass farthing."