"Last year I built a Courage Machine, but I thought it might be noisy and was too afraid to turn it on. So I coated it with glue, covered it with cat hair, mounted it on my wall, and started claiming it was an exotic animal I killed on a Safari in Africa. I'd like to believe people believe me, on account of it being so strange that it has to be true."
"I make love like my afternoon shadow is long. I'll bring the foreplay, if you bring the guacamole. (Yes, I know there is a 99-cent upcharge.)"
"I believe the way to master my destiny is to serve others. If I raise up others, am I not also raised up?"
"If you want to steal my heart, you must realize it's not a one-time heist. This theft will take every minute of the rest of your life."
"She cuts me deep with her words, with her withholding of words, and with her knife. I’m not sure which is the most painful."
"Instead of a vow of silence, I took a vow of invisibility. At that time you were looking for someone to love, and that’s why you couldn’t see me."