More quotes by George Carlin

"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"
"I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. I really tried to believe that, but I gotta tell you, the longer you live, the more you look around, the more you realize, something is fucked up."
"How is it possible to have a civil war?"
"There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls."
"It's important in life if you don't give a shit. It can help you a lot."