More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book Has No Title

"She had two lips like strawberries, and the seeds gave her kisses texture. I preferred kissing her over two scoops of vanilla ice cream."
"I skimmed the pond scum with a spoon like broth in a soup bowl. Why does everything have to remind me of her?"
"Is there a word halfway between hello and goodbye? Because that’s the word my soul is trying to say."
"Coaching 101: First you build the team, and then you build the torture chamber for underperformers."
"I’m up for the Julius Caesar Author of the Year Award this year. I’m tremendously proud, considering Caesar is the guy who burned down the Library of Alexandria."