#Trees

"Older doesn't necessarily mean wiser. Some trees live to be hundreds of years old, and what the fuck do they know?"

"I watched the leaves change colors, and I thought, “People do that too. Their hair changes color as they age.” I remember that as my grandpa got older, his hair went from green to yellow to red, like a traffic light, only with slightly less honking."

"The clearest way into the Universe is through a forest wilderness."

"I love the sound of the trees in the breeze. If the forest is so clearly musical, why can’t it play the guitar while I sing Nirvana covers?"

"I'm hanging on to her memory like Spanish moss on an ancient Florida oak, and unlike the sunset, my love won't fade."

"Professional wrestling is a lot like cuddling, I thought as I hugged a tree. As far as lumberjacks go, I’m slow, but when the tree finally falls for me, it falls hard."

"If you really want to eat, keep climbing. The fruits are on the top of the tree. Stretch your hands and keep stretching them. Success is on the top, keep going."

"Of all the trees we could've hit, we had to get one that hits back."

"Love the trees until their leaves fall off, then encourage them to try again next year."

"I fall in love with you four times a year: winter, spring, summer, and fall. The leaves may change, but how I feel about you does not."

"Look: the trees exist; the houseswe dwell in stand there stalwartly. Only wepass by it all, like a rush of air.And everything conspires to keep quiet about us,half out of shame perhaps, half out of some secret hope."

"And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat."

"Love is like a forest, I think as I kill trees by squandering toilet paper while “decorating” my ex girlfriend’s front yard."

"To catch affection, try being efficient by using a fishing net. You can’t sit back and wait for romance to grow on trees."

"Together kabobs make the world better than all the Bobs combined. Well, at least ever since Bob Ross moved on to the land of the happy trees."

"If I were a tree, I would have no reason to love a human."

"All our wisdom is stored in the trees."

"I wish I could climb the corporate ladder like I could climb a tree, but I can’t, because I’m afraid of heights. And bark."

"If lightning is the anger of the gods, then the gods are concerned mostly about trees."

"Trees shaped like deer should not be ridden like benches if they get stuck up in other trees. No hunting farming allowed. Fishing only."