"My girlfriend just bought me a portable toaster. And my birthday’s coming up, so I’m half expecting her to buy me a portable bathtub to go along with it."
"Our love will blend together like turquoise is blue and green. There’s no depression or envy when both blur into one."
"People don't care what I wear or don't wear, and even if I don't wear anything people will cover for me if they know that I care about them."
"I think about her sometimes, and wonder what she’s doing and who she’s doing it with. I suppose I could just stalk her Facebook page like a normal person, but that doesn’t seem as romantic as surveillance and GPS tracking."
"I wear a ten-gallon cowboy hat. That’s where I keep my fish tank. When you’re a farmer of love, you’ve always got pink kissers on your mind."
"She plants love, and she grows roses. The fragrance of romance comes from the blossom that blooms in the heart."