More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I make love like I make coffee. Tuesdays and Thursdays I offer free refills."
"I remember her words about remembering my words, and that’s when it hit me: the quickest way to scalpel open a heart is with a declaration of love."
"I said I made a special trip to get her favorite item, because it sounded more romantic than admitting I randomly had it already. Now that’s love."
"Last year I built a Courage Machine, but I thought it might be noisy and was too afraid to turn it on. So I coated it with glue, covered it with cat hair, mounted it on my wall, and started claiming it was an exotic animal I killed on a Safari in Africa. I'd like to believe people believe me, on account of it being so strange that it has to be true."
"I got a zero. That’s like a perfect ten—it’s only one away from being flawless. Remember this next time you think you have nothing."