More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Either I will love you, or I will love you if and only if you love me in return. I prefer the former."
"Some people grow vegetables by day, but I grow shadows by night. Right now my only customer is the US government, but the profit is unbelievable."
"Combine a fog machine and a cotton candy maker to create delicious mystery. This is the heart of romance."
"I think a cool #startup would be a company that makes Finish line tape, for marathons. In the long run, it could be very profitable."
"Last year I built a Courage Machine, but I thought it might be noisy and was too afraid to turn it on. So I coated it with glue, covered it with cat hair, mounted it on my wall, and started claiming it was an exotic animal I killed on a Safari in Africa. I'd like to believe people believe me, on account of it being so strange that it has to be true."