Night clubs are where Americans learn the laws of motion. - Bauvard, Some Inspiration for the Overenthusiastic

"The lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners."

"The idealist hopes. The romantic sees doom. The postmodernist sees doom and hopes."

"Education: learning to find your purpose. Upon finding your purpose: what did I learn?"

"I wanted to have premarital sex with a midget, but I was afraid the ringmaster would banish me for unlawful carnival knowledge."

"The idealist hopes. The romantic sees doom. The postmodernist sees doom and hopes."