"Nothing in this world feels quite like freedom, except for freedom. And nothing in the world tastes quite like freedom, except for fried bald eagles."
"Whether you live to be 50 or 100 makes no difference, if you made no difference in the world."
"I’d love to create a personal profile on a dating site with a headline that reads, “Great Listener Seeks Mute Woman."
"My birthday is on a holiday. I just have to wait until I die and they commemorate me."
"Not only am I thinking about getting a nose job, but I’m also trying to get employment for the rest of my face."
"Not only am I thinking about getting a nose job, but I’m also trying to get employment for the rest of my face."