Once a Ponce a time she made me feel like a conquistador. No... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"My hands will get dirty holding your rose-shaped heart, because love is like gardening—it’s earthy and takes work to keep it alive."

"Behold, the number five is at hand. Grab it and shake and harness the power of networking."

"I would argue that unless the two people are in love, all sex is bad sex, because why eat cotton candy when you can have edible clouds? Sure, it seems sweet at the time, but that’s just a carnival and carnal rush and wears off quickly. But love adds an extra dimension that takes an earthy thing like sex and makes it absolutely heavenly."

"The word very will vary in muchiness. I love you very much, and that won’t vary from day to day."

"She said she loved me, and I believed her, because she was looking directly at another man when she said it."