Once a Ponce a time she made me feel like a conquistador. No... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"That point in the sky where yellow meets blue, that’s a handshake I want to see at a #networking event. Sunglasses sold separately."

"When anybody asks me what time it is, I always say, “Yesterday, plus 24 hours."

"I’m going to go out on a limb and say that’s the best place to hang a noose. More politicians need to be sticking their necks out for us."

"I must be a great leader because many people follow me. Most of the people are police officers, if that gives you any indication of my character."

"I am a fisherman among farmers, and as a farmer what I grow is tired of waiting for her to love me."