More quotes by Ellen DeGeneres

"For some reason, we can't just enjoy somebody else's success. Somehow, that's going to affect us. If they have more, then I have less - and I don't know why."
"I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that."
"I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her."
"Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it."
"You should never assume. You know what happens when you assume. You make an ass out of you and me because that's how it's spelled."