The best way to keep children at home is to make the home at... - Dorothy Parker

"Don't look at me in that tone of voice."

"That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment."

"I hate writing, I love having written."

"It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day."

"If I had a shiny gun I could have a world of fun Speeding bullets through the brains Of the folks that cause me pains :)"