#knowing-oneself

"God Made God made our beingour parents our bodyphilosophy our mindchildren our compassionhostory our loyaltywork our self-esteembattles our heroismpoetry our soulsoulmates our lovewhich stitches it all togetherinto a life."

"Finding Fault [10w] + {Couplet} We find in others faultWhenever our wounds perceives salt."

"Predestination [10w] 'Twas predestined that I'd call predestination a crock of shit."

"Men Be Forewarned! [20w] A man caught in the embrace of the wrong womanis like having his penis caught in a bear trap."

"A Loaf of Challah Haiku A loaf of challah,a bottle of Rashi wine...For everything else there's Simply Manischewitz."

"Food If food comes with a labelthat's warning enough you shouldn't eat it."

"The Bonds That Tie Weak bonding is sharing a common interest;strong bonding is sharing a common enemy."

"Facebook's New Marketing Slogan "We can only be lonesome together.900,000,000 served."

"Over-Douse [10w] Trying to mask death's smell,old ladies over-douse on perfume."

"Bagels and Lox Life's an everything bagel;love is a schmear of scallion cream cheese;and lox, no matter how you cut it,is resistant to dumbass metaphors."

"Save the Last Dance for Me Life is a Hesitation Waltz danced to swing time measure. We're all given the free will to suspend our moving foot or slowly drag it during the halt."

"What Women Think Women don't care if you got a six pack if you slurp you soup."

"Doldrums People who live in the doldrumscan't throw caution to the wind."

"Natural Born Killers [10w] After their first,every soldier becomes a natural born killer."

"Recollection [10w] Recollection recategorize memoriesby sorting them out into different collections."

"My Secret for Out-of-the-Box-Thinking To help me writein my signature out-of-the-box style,I sit in front of my humidifier that I've filled up with Grey Goose vodka.My humidifier is now at Underwriters Laboratoriesin a 12-Step Programand buddied up with a de-humidifier."

"When in Doubt [10w] If your relationship becomes stagnant,set fire to her dress."

"The Road to Hell The road to hell is paved with 16 in. x 16 in. Red Brickface Concrete Step Stones.Only $2.97 each.Always in Stock atThe Home Depot."

"Occam's Razor [10w] I shaved with Occam's razor and he shaved with mine."

"Sunshine On My Shoulders When you're home's always filled with sunshine,you're either blessed or it's time to fix the roof."