#masters

"Man vs. Chimp Even chimpanzees are toolmakers,but only man has the unique honor of being a Godmaker."

"Do Me No Favors Haiku 'Do me no favors ~I can take care of myself.So, pay the check and drive me home."

"Life Imprisonment with No Possibility of Parole [10w] "The needle is preferable to three hots and a cot."

"Lost & Found of Love We cannot forfeit what was not truly ours to begin with.You can only lose yourself in the heartbreak of love lostand find yourself againinthe miracle of love regained."

"Spooning [10w] Love means tasting her spaghetti sauce on a wooden spoon."

"Poorly Hidden [10w] We're incapable of hiding arrogance, ambition or being in love."

"The Rubik's Cube of Omár my Mán A Key of Coke underneath the Bough,A Jug of Jack, a Brick of Hash ~ Newsflash:'Now who the fuck needs Thou'."

"Death Ride Denied At the stables of your agonyDeath brought his morbid mareTo whisk you from your woeful wantsAnd coax you from your cares.A ride you did deny this princeAnd bid him soft farewell,Hoping the morrow must be brighter sinceYour yesterdays were hell."

"Vices [10w] Cultivate vices;to be without them is not to be."

"Dogs [10w] Dogs never lie about love,but occasionally fake an orgasm."

"Love Poetry [10w] Love poetry is simply bleeding on the page with ink."

"Transubstantiation [10w] Transubstantiate digression into confessionand drink from poetry's Holy Grail."

"Prayer [10w] Despite God's grace, prayer is not a wish granting well."

"Some Semblance of Such "To lose one's identity to a Doppelgänger may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose multiple identities speaks of Nabakov."

"Seduction [10w] Italy will host the Olympics when seduction's declared a sport."

"New Year's Revolving Door [10w] + [10w] + {Couplet} 2015's revolution commences with the overthrow of New Year's resolution.Seek not absolutionfor our weak character's immune to evolution."

"Lady Gaga Haiku A cow has a big head, deep voice, a long tongue, butLady Gaga he's not."

"Scientifically Proven [10w] Mariah Carey has a brain the size of a walnut."

"Fucking 3rd World Taxi Drivers [10w] Taxi drivers have ruined more vacations than tsunamis or earthquakes."

"Goat Fucking for Dummies You gently fuck a female goat ~you got to ram the malesto make any progress."