#Meditation

"Love on Fire [10w] A man in love cannot see fire or smell smoke."

"Time Time waits for no man ~but for hot women Time makes exceptions."

"Humans vs. Monkeys [10w] + [10w] Baby monkeys are much more clever than a human babies.Human babies leap ahead because of their capacity for language."

"How to Get Girls into Bed When I take a new girl out on a dateI tell them I slipped poison into their wineand the antidote is on my penis."

"Rat Trap Haiku 'Hmm, 12 by 13,4 by 9. Oy! You call thisrat trap an apartment?"

"Bruges Belgium Haiku Behind a stack of grey Lego bricksyou wheeze up Belfry's 366 stepsand don't see a single bat."

"One Philosophical Question, Two Faces [10w] 'Is life wort living?' is tantamount to'Does God exist?"

"Neanderthal Poetry A poem should come as quick as lightningand create the awe Neanderthals felt cringing in their caves when hearing a clap of thunder."

"Witticisms The greatest reward for coming up with some witty turn of phraseis that some day, if you're lucky,it may wind up in a fortune cookieat the very Chinese restaurant you're eating in!But if you get a big head about it,know it wasn't the flattery,it was the MSG."

"Embittered [10w] "His heart blistered like paint peeling from an old rig."

"Spineless [10w] There are more spineless men on the planet than jellyfish."

"Is Prayer Only for Man? I [10w] Does God pray for His creation's in Heaven and Earth?"

"What's in it for me?' A selfish person doesn't become compassionate as the result of some words of wisdom or epiphany. The selfish need selfish reasons to act unselfish."

"Hope for the Heartbroken A broken heartremains in piecesbut learns to love againwith every fragment."

"Arches National Park, Utah BloodshotZiggurats of rock against unbending sky,sandstone fins and eyes of ancient earth behemoth.Your windows wedged by cosmic hands of rain and melting snow, of frost and ice, of gravity and geologic time, patient and untiring,self-possessed like a child's perception of endless summer."

"A Note from Time Management [10w] Our time machine's temporarily out of order. Come back yesterday."

"Genocide [10w] Genocide is the runaway bride once death becomes the bridegroom."

"Cookie Cutter Criticism A critic tried to fit my sense of humor in a cookie cutter,but it wouldn't fit his preconceived shape of what comedy should be.So he pressed harder, and harder and harder until the cookie cutter cut a cookie shaperight through the palm of his hand.It doesn't hurt anymore when the critic tries to slap me in the face.There's no more hot-air resistance."

"In a True Global World... [10w] Famous people should be allowed to travel without a passport."

"Love and Blindness [10w] Love may be unilaterally blind,but divorce blinds both parties."