#positive-attitude

"Old People [10w] At the mere mention of death they gasp for breath."

"Silly String [10w] Life' an absurdity radiating from a spine of silly string."

"Hellman's Mayonnaise: Bring out the Hellman's and bring out the best... ...artery clogger since Burger King’s Triple Whopper with Cheese."

"Flattery [10w] Flattery is the only passport that will get you everywhere"

"One Size Fits All Life Strategy Smile first.Ask questions later."

"Travel [10w] The difference between a traveler and vacationer is one arrives."

"Animal Species Identity [10w] Funny how animals know their own species without a mirror."

"Nomad {Couplet} When your roots grow from the outside in,home becomes whatever place you're in."

"Your comfort zone is a place where you keep yourself in a self-illusion and nothing can grow there but your potentiality can grow only when you can think and grow out of that zone."

"Spontaneous Gift Giving [10w] Learn to give gifts spontaneously accompanied by a love note."

"Herpes [10w] Only greatness and genital herpes are conspicuous by their absence."

"Let's Celebrate! Photoshop Turns 25 This Week [10w] I bought a fake passport on Fiverr.Don't tell Mexico."

"Money vs. Happiness [10w] Why do people with money say,'money can't buy happiness'?"

"Spooning [10w] Love means tasting her spaghetti sauce on a wooden spoon."

"Virtual Friends [10w] Internet camaraderie's bullshit because these 'friends' can't be relied upon."

"How to Treat Your Lover {Couplet} If you want to learn how your lover best to treat,Pretend each time is the last time you'll ever meet."

"Is Prayer Only for the Living? III [10w] Do angels pray to God to intercede on mankind's behalf?"

"Rain Check I'm a shitty typist and speller, I hunt and peck,I wrote, "i LeFt mY sWeEtToOtH iN yOuR nEcKoF tHe WoOdS, cOuLd YoU pLeAsE bRiNgIt BeCk."Surprisingly, you did,and left."rAiN cHeCk."

"Carrots and Creativity [10w] Put a carrot in front of you for optimal creativity."

"Lady Gaga Haiku A cow has a big head, deep voice, a long tongue, butLady Gaga he's not."