J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

"Don’t put your wand there, boy! ... Better wizards than you have lost buttocks, you know!"

"Just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn't mean we all have."

"Give her hell from us, Peeves."

"You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!""What are Fred and I? Next door neighbors?"

"Harry, don't go picking a row with Malfoy, don't forget, he's a prefect now, he could make life difficult for you...""Wow, I wonder what it'd be like to have a difficult life?"said Harry sarcastically."

"I am not forgotten, you know, no, I still receive a very great deal of fan mail.. . . Gladys Gudgeon writes weekly. . . . I just wish I knew why. . . .”He paused, looking faintly puzzled, then beamed again and returned to his signing with renewed vigor. “I suspect it is simply my good looks. . . ."

"It unscrews the other way."

"Did you see me disarm Hermione, Harry?""Only once"said Hermione stung. "I got you loads more then you got me—""I did not only get you once, I got you at least three times—""Well if you're counting the one where you tripped over your own feet and knocked the wand out of my hand—"

"Why were you lurking under our window?""Yes - yes, good point, Petunia! What were you doing under our windows, boy?""Listening to the news,"said Harry in a resigned voice.His aunt and uncle exchanged looks of outrage."Listening to the news! Again?""Well, it changes every day, you see,"said Harry."

"You know, Minister, I disagree with Dumbledore on many counts...but you cannot deny he's got style..."

"And anyway, it’s not as though I’ll never see Mum again, is it?"

"His priority did not seem to be to teach them what he knew, but rather to impress upon them that nothing, not even... knowledge, was foolproof."

"Yeah, Quirrell was a great teacher. There was just that minor drawback of him having Lord Voldemort sticking out of the back of his head!"