J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

"Hello, Harry"said George, beaming at him. "We thought we heard your dulcet tones.""You don't want to bottle up your anger like that, Harry, let it all out,"said Fred, also beaming. "There might be a couple of people fifty miles away who didn't hear you."

"My Head of House said I lacked certain necessary qualities...like the ability to behave myself."

"Just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn't mean we all have."

"Accio Brain!"

"Why were you lurking under our window?""Yes - yes, good point, Petunia! What were you doing under our windows, boy?""Listening to the news,"said Harry in a resigned voice.His aunt and uncle exchanged looks of outrage."Listening to the news! Again?""Well, it changes every day, you see,"said Harry."

"Ask us no questions and we’ll tell you no lies."

"Would you like a cough drop Dolores?"

"Is it true that you shouted at Professor Umbridge?""Yes.""You called her a liar?""Yes.""You told her He Who Must Not Be Named is back?""Yes.""Have a biscuit, Potter."

"Yeah, Quirrell was a great teacher. There was just that minor drawback of him having Lord Voldemort sticking out of the back of his head!"

"Well, we were always going to fail that one,"said Ron gloomily as they ascended the marble staircase. He had just made Harry feel rather better by telling him how he told the examiner in detail about the ugly man with a wart on his nose in the crystal ball, only to look up and realize he had been describing the examiner's reflection."

"You know, Minister, I disagree with Dumbledore on many counts...but you cannot deny he's got style..."

"Wit beyond measure is a man's greatest treasure."

"It unscrews the other way."