#sarcasm

"Are you insinuatin' that my daughter is a liar?""Oh, no, not at all. I'm saying your daughter is a liar. Surely you can appreciate the difference."

"At this time of year it's easy to forget the true meaning of Christianity - the lies, the corruption, the abuse."

"A slinky is a toy made for stairs, but that’s entirely too tiresome. What about a toy for escalators that doesn’t move and does nothing and that’s the whole point? I think Americans would relate to and embrace that mentality."

"Anything disguised as anything is chameleon. A ghost disguised as an unobservable and invisible object is a great example. Still, that’s easier to see than the love my ex wife had for me."

"It’s fascinating. You know all these words, and they’re all English, but when you string them together into sentences, they just don’t make any sense."

"How long have you been with Raphael?”“You ask a lot of questions for a dead woman.”“What can I say? I prefer to die well-informed.”-Venom and Elena"

"I’m so sunburned I’m embarrassed, but you can’t tell I’m blushing because I’m sunburned. I’m so ashamed I could just lie on the beach and die."

"Katniss: 'What about you? Ive seen you in the market. You can lift hundred pound bags of flour'. I snap at himTell him that. Thats not nothing.Peeta: Yes and Im sure the arena will be full of bags of flour for me to chuck at people."

"Will suspected Jem was in fact cleverer than he was himself - but he lacked Will's tendency to assume the absolute worst about people and proceed from there."

"Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt."

"By the way, if you get mad at your Mac laptop and wonder who designed this demonic device, notice the manufacturer's icon on top: an apple with a bite out of it."

"This is what happened in love. One of you cried a lot and then both of you grew sarcastic."

"I don't do what I'm told, but I might do what you want if you ask me nicely."

"Hey, Carlos,"the Professor says when he walks in. "How was REACH?""It sucked.""Can you be more specific?"my guardian asks."It really sucked,"I elaborate, sarcasm dripping from every word."

"A diary with no drawings of me in it? Where are the torrid fantasies? The romance covers?"

"Alec looked at her and shook his head. "How do you manage never to get mud on your clothes?"Isabelle shrugged philosophically. "I'm pure at heart. It repels the dirt."

"I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull a muscle, so I stretch a lot. That's why I'm constantly either rolling my eyes or yawning."

"In my opinion, I think sarcasm and humor in a song, without turning it into a novelty song, is really charming."

"Sometimes Americans don't quite get my sense of humor. My good ol' British sarcasm seems to go over their heads."

"...even though I was getting better education at home than any of the kids in Toyah, I'd need to go to finishing school when I was thirteen, both to acquire social graces and to earn a diploma. Because in this world, Dad said, it's not enough to have a fine education. You need a piece of paper to prove you go it."