Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That w... - Steve Martin

"I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper."

"It's so hard to believe in anything anymore. I mean, it's like, religion, you really can't take it seriously, because it seems so mythological, it seems so arbitrary...but, on the other hand, science is just pure empiricism, and by virtue of its method, it excludes metaphysics. I guess I wouldn't believe in anything anymore if it weren't for my lucky astrology mood watch."

"I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks."

"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."