He had just about enough intelligence to open his mouth when... - P.G. Wodehouse

"In a series of events, all of which had been a bit thick, this, in his opinion, achieved the maximum of thickness."

"There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature."

"I know I was writing stories when I was five. I don't know what I did before that. Just loafed, I suppose."

"As for Gussie Finknottle, many an experienced undertaker would have been deceived by his appearance and started embalming on sight."

"There is only one cure for grey hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine."