More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"If my legs get blown off in war, I’d like to have them replaced with a coffee table. Half man/half furniture, I’ll be in the living room if you need me."
"I like knocking on strangers’ doors, and when they answer and say hello, I respond, “I have returned, as prophesied.” Then I just stand there staring at them."
"I want a moon canoe, because have you ever tried paddling through dirt? Love is a journey, and I try to travel as efficiently as I can."
"I don’t remember my birth. I guess I got dementia at a young age."
"Man is solid, not liquid. But with the fluid nature of networking, my personal brand would grow faster if I would just go with the flow."