Hotel hallways should have conveyer belts for floors, so I c... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Too many abused beers have suffered in the name of networking. Let us find a better way to mix torture and business."

"I sip my coffee like I fall in love—alone in a field of flowers, writing poetry for the mailman, who delivers love letters, but never gets any."

"White letters plus white paper equals invisibility. Just because you can’t see my love for you, doesn’t mean I didn’t write about it."

"To be invisible, paint yourself with the direct shade of zero. Leave nothing to chance, by taking nothing with you wherever you go."

"I love firm hugs. Statues are so affectionate. Well, at least compared to my ex wife."