"I want to write a song about the only girl I’ve ever loved. And the chorus will say something like, “I really want to see you tonight, so I hope you leave your blinds open."
"I run like I walk—only slower. And I make love like a one-man circus show."
"Life, it’s made up of two things—time and love. A watch tells one, but what tells the other? We tell each other."
"I wish every envelope enclosed a love letter. It’s this hope that leads me to open strangers’ mail. So you see, I’m a romantic, not an NSA employee."
"A coffin would make a great suitcase. If I folded it neatly, I’ll bet I could pack in all my love for you."
"In a blind taste-test, my kisses were rated as Helen Kelleresque. Women love how the only sense I keenly possess is nonsense."