If I could convert books to wine, I’d start with The Grapes... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"It’s better if you don’t come at all, then come and act like you don’t want to be here. The same applies to there, when I’m there, which is also confusingly here, though it’s not here it’s there."

"If what you wear says more about who you are then what you say when you speak, then my advice is to keep quiet and wear loud clothing."

"With eyes closed, a kiss is genderless. Now that mustaches are in fashion, some women are finding more hipster love."

"I’m just going to keep plugging away until I find success—or an electrical socket that works. This is the secret to gaining worldly power."

"Leadership is being the first to put others second. Wait, that’s not right. That’s politics."