If you tell me I look like someone you know, I might get pan... - Jarod Kintz, $3.33
"If you tell me I look like someone you know, I might get panicked and think you’re on to me. I thought nobody saw me abduct that guy and steal his identity."
More quotes by Jarod Kintz, $3.33
"Any lustful fool can love a million women, but only a real man can love one woman cloned a million times."
"I am a master of logic and a powerfully convincing debater. In fact, against my better judgment, I can talk myself out of doing anything."
"I want to own a wind farm. Don’t breathe, or you’ll undermine the price of my crop."
"You’re used to being the smartest guy in the room. Solitary confinement will do that."
"I called an insurance company to get a quote. They gave me one of Oscar Wilde’s best."