More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I kissed a mystery, and it tasted like a woman. Lips are always full of delicious secrets."
"I sympathize with a mother who has three mouths to feed—especially if two of those mouths are on her face. With a woman like that I’d listen twice as hard for doublespeak. I’m pretty accustomed to picking up on political rhetoric."
"Unreturned love is like trying to make a sandwich with one slice of bread. Don’t stress—fold it in half and love yourself."
"A love story in six words: Hello. Goodbye. In between was marriage."
"Her love was too cold, like an anti-oven. That's called a freezer, and sometimes it burns food. She gave me heartburn, just like coffee, and it really woke me up to the reality of relationships."