"Love is a bicycle with two pancakes for wheels. You may see love as more of an exercise in hard work, but I see it as more of a breakfast on the go."
"You don’t need to have a fight before great sex. I can keep my cool and still bring the heat every time."
"I fall in love with you four times a year: winter, spring, summer, and fall. The leaves may change, but how I feel about you does not."
"Between Portland and Seattle is a mint factory, and they made sweets like we made sweet love, and America needs more manufacturers like us."
"A woman I had sex with is carrying my child, because God has made it so that my hands are full. They’re full of hope for the future."
"He’s as tall as a tree, but he fights like a rose bush. What’s with all the scratching? I should cut him down in the name of romance."