More quotes by Jarod Kintz, It Occurred to Me

"The mouth is made for communication, and nothing is more articulate than a kiss."
"If I were an armadillo, and a stranger came up and said I looked familiar, and they wanted to know why I looked so familiar, I'd respond in a raspy voice, "Your brother ran over my brother."
"To me, beer tastes like piss. Maybe that's why I only enjoy it in the shower with my uncle."
"I think it would be neat to meet a man who slept with one eye open, especially if that man was a Cyclops."
"If loving someone is putting them in a straitjacket and kicking them down a flight of stairs, then yes, I have loved a few people."