"My writing has appeared in the New Yorker and The Atlantic Monthly, though whenever the newsstand guy catches me scribbling my poetry in them, he always comes along later and erases it."
"I find Bukowski to be so edgy, gritty, and daring that he oozes romance, and if couples read him in bed they would appreciate what they have."
"I just bought a bag of potato-chip-flavored air. I also bought a bed, but sleep wasn’t included. Thank God a cup of coffee is full of wakefulness."
"Some men have actually died from laughing. That's so funny I fear for my own life."
"I drank her essence, and it’s like she never existed and now I’m thirsty again. Let this be a lesson in love."
"When you give everything and expect nothing in return, only then will you be in a position to gain anything. When you love loving, you give because giving is getting. Giving is a gift unto itself, and when you realize this you understand that you can’t network if you can’t love."