Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling... - Ambrose Bierce, The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

"Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage."

"Pray, v. To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner, confessedly unworthy."

"Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another."

"Faith, n. Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel."

"NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi."