"The difference between a karate chop and a high five is the same as the difference between a knife and a paddle. My love can slice like a piece of pizza."
"You know you’re in love when you reach out to hold your woman’s hand, without remembering that her hands are full because you insisted she carry all the groceries out to the car."
"When we make love, I orgasm much sooner than her. That’s because I know a shortcut on my bicycle."
"Two become one when two are in love—or when the waitress asks about our dinner bill. I’ll pay next time, I promise."
"Your love story, I don’t want to give away the ending, but both you and your lover die."
"A crate full of discreet would appear to be empty. But it’s not. It’s full of my love for you."