"Why take the stairs when someone else can take them for you? Love is like a flight of stairs—somebody’s going to take them, so I may as well be unselfish and take the elevator."
"The difference between a karate chop and a high five is the same as the difference between a knife and a paddle. My love can slice like a piece of pizza."
"She called it a slap, but I called it a high-five to my face. Love is so encouraging!"
"He said he came in second place, so I assumed there were only two competitors. But you never know with love, there may have been a third party involved."
"She was washing all the dishes by hand, so I bought her a machine. I bought her a lawnmower. That’s what you do when you’re in love."
"Life, it’s made up of two things—time and love. A watch tells one, but what tells the other? We tell each other."