#masters

"Excuse The bureaucrat's excuse, 'If I have to make an exception for you,I have to make an exception for everybody else',doesn't apply to me because I exceptional."

"Inspiration vs. Plagiarism [10w] Inspiration is improving on another's idea;plagiarism is copy/paste piracy."

"Women Kissing :-)*(-: Women kissing publicly it has all the sincerity of an Israeli soldier hugging a Palestinian secretly checking for an explosive vest.* ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿’̿’̵͇̿̿з=(இಠ ᴈ muah εఠയ=/̵͇̿̿/̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿*自"

"Fighting For Your Life [10w] 'Everything will be alright,'doesn't mean we stop the fight."

"Preparation [10w] Hope for the best, but prepare for your insufferable wife."

"The Written Word The only thing I hold dearer than myself(and my moms, yo') ~is the written word.I'd give my life for that bitch, (yo'.)"

"Optimists vs. Death [10w] Optimists are hopeful people who see a coffin as half-full."

"Please Don't Commemorate Me Just Yet [10w] The living are only commemorated when they're at death's door."

"I'm Not Talking About Fruitcake [10w] The greatest gifts are the ones that can be regifted."

"Shit Poetry [10w] Poetry without grace of expression is just so much shit."

"Kill Buddha's Hairdresser [10w] I'd like to meet Buddha's hairdresser and shoot the prick."

"Origami Master If you're the greatest origami master in the worldmaybe I can find you a job folding napkins at a restaurant.I'm not making any promises."

"O God O God I love you.I worship you, I need you.Everything I am is because of you.Everything.O God I hate you."

"Mint Julep {Couplet} I've had more than a hint of a tulip or two,after treating them to a mint julep, or two."

"Chutzpah {Limerick} Despite your unmitigated audacity,you're effrontery remains one of opacity.Let me suggest you turn Jewand learn chutzpah too,to realize your fullest capacity."

"Lotto If I won a million bucks in Lotto,I'd give it to Charity.Charity gives great head."

"Regret [10w] Regret's more about lost opportunities than about paths we've chosen."

"Pitter Patter I love to hear the pitter patter of little feet ~as they unsuccessfully struggle to break free of my choke hold."

"Self-Contempt [10w] Self-contempt is calling yourself collect and refusing to accept the charges."

"Don't Mess with the Queen {Couplet} The first man harnessing the secrets of fireCannot compare with the revelation of your sovereign ire."