#mastery

"Jesus Christ Hiaku Jesus Christget a job already.You're killing your mother!"

"Memory Timeline of Divorce Divorce +1 year: "Just because we don't talk, it doesn't mean I can't stop thinking about you."Divorce +10 years: "The one good thing that came out of our marriage was our wonderful children."Divorce +20 year: "Who? Doesn't ring a bell."

"Over [10w] It's never ever over because the fat lady can't sing."

"Poets, Shakespeare and Trash A poet must read equal amountsof trash and Shakespeare to learn how to distinguish between the two."

"Self-Sufficiency [10w] When God closes a door,buy a Sawzall from Home Depot."

"Preparation [10w] Hope for the best, but prepare for your insufferable wife."

"Curse of the Ageing Woman {Couplet} I'm a wallflower, bluestocking, left on the Shelf, When you're beyond one's sell-by date, you've left by yourself,"

"Time Time waits for no man ~but for hot women Time makes exceptions."

"Want vs. What's Coming to You As the Rolling Stones say,You can't always get what you want ~but God will always give you what's coming to you."

"Thorny Love [10w] A thorn by any other name would hurt as much."

"In the Future [1]: (criminals) In the future we're going to find a wayto turn criminals into wordsand then place them in parentheses."

"Neanderthal Poetry A poem should come as quick as lightningand create the awe Neanderthals felt cringing in their caves when hearing a clap of thunder."

"The Poet as Enchantress [10w] + {Couplet} The poet is an enchantress,with or without a dress."

"A Note from Time Management [10w] Our time machine's temporarily out of order. Come back yesterday."

"How to End Racism [10w] The children of interracial marriages should look like panda bears."

"Fear is the Best Test Will the fear of going blind make youa voracious reader, a world traveleror paralyze you with a thousand other fears?"

"Lotto If I won a million bucks in Lotto,I'd give it to Charity.Charity gives great head."

"Dictator [10w] Clever dictators keep their friends closeand their enemies dead."

"Senility [10w] Senility's like a bottle of Coke that lost its bubbles."

"Garden [10w] A garden is a poem written with flowers on earth."