#positive-outlook

"Buddha (Haiku) Buddha, Enlightened,I rub your belly to blessmy Lotto ticket."

"Dsylıxǝa Hey, it isn't cool to make fun of people with Dsʎlıxǝaʎou dɯub pircʞ ¡!¡"

"Choice vs. Disease [10w] People who label lack of control a disease evade responsibility."

"Q & A The illness of our time is not that we lack for answers;man's tragedy is that we've forgotten the important questions."

"2 Rules on Becoming a Good Poet [10w] Rule#1: Never write shitty poetry.Rule#2: Never forget Rule #1."

"Hustling [10w] Fishing's the world's oldest profession;only the bait has changed."

"Battered Women [5w] Battered womenare more crispy."

"Visual Pun [10w] Example of visual pun:cloud shaped like a banana peel."

"How to Treat Your Lover {Couplet} If you want to learn how your lover best to treat,Pretend each time is the last time you'll ever meet."

"Pussy Whipped I was pussy whipped with four lashes.It was a helluva threesome ~but I still can't get the damn mascara off my one-eyed snake."

"Il Principe 2015: Lesson 1 - The Balls If humility is what's all important to your adversary,humble yourself before him,and you've got him by the balls."

"Thorn [5w] Every thorn has its rose."

"Occam's Razor [10w] I shaved with Occam's razor and he shaved with mine."

"What lies beneath the Semblance? What lies beneath the semblance.What lies beneath the semblance of lies.What lies beneath the semblance of lies!Lies lie beneath her semblance.Lies lie beneath her semblance.Lies, lies and more lies!"

"One Philosophical Question, Two Faces [10w] 'Is life wort living?' is tantamount to'Does God exist?"

"Concatenate /kənˈkætəneɪt/to link together, as in a chain Do you concatenate cats by tying their tails together or do you just stuff the tail of one into the mouth of the other?Which method is better for yanking your chain?"

"Alaska State Motto North to the Future.We got highest rape and STD-rate in the nation."

"Virtual Reality [10w] The only thing better than reality is perfected virtual reality."

"What Women Think Women don't care if you got a six pack if you slurp you soup."

"Kansas Haiku "Ya' know Superman'sfrom here and Jor-El could'vesent him to New York."