#sacred

"Lowbrows vs. Highbrows If you show something lowbrow to a highbrow does it wind up becoming crusty eye caca?"

"Sometimes it's Love and Sometimes the... [10w] ...tingling sensation of excitement, happiness, and nervousnessis jock itch."

"BMW: The ultimate driving machine... ...just like our gas chambers were the ultimate killing machines."

"Death & Poetry Nothing softens the blow of death like a cushy poem to fall upon."

"Origami Master If you're the greatest origami master in the worldmaybe I can find you a job folding napkins at a restaurant.I'm not making any promises."

"Animal Species Identity [10w] Funny how animals know their own species without a mirror."

"Telekinetic Poker Players Telekinetic poker players have a tell when they're bluffing:they always raise you."

"Keep Your Day Job Bitch [10w] + {Couplet} If you've guessed that I'm blessed,augury ain't your strawberry."

"What is the Meaning of Life? [10w] {6} To be transformed into all we are capable of becoming."

"Cruel Love [10w] Cruel love helps turn out excellent,competitive, cutthroat, dog-eat-dog children."

"Let's Celebrate! Photoshop Turns 25 This Week [10w] I bought a fake passport on Fiverr.Don't tell Mexico."

"Damn You, TripAdvisor! My penis deserves to be a World Heritage Site,judging by the number of tourists trampling on my balls."

"Why Don't You Practice What You Preach [10w] The reason I teach and preach?In order to learn."

"Note to Self: Patent #10w Diving Mask for fish filled with water when oceans disappear."

"How to Get Girls into Bed When I take a new girl out on a dateI tell them I slipped poison into their wineand the antidote is on my penis."

"Show Up [10w] I've waited for you all my life ~show up already!"

"Upgrading [10w] Promise them the worldto get the universe in return."

"Snob [10w[ I'm throwing a party so exclusive I'm not even invited."

"Maintaining the Distance between Wealth and Poverty [10w] The nouveau riche are far more ruthlessthan the rich."

"Cancer [10w] It's odd that the cancer that kills you is you."