#soul-searching

"Treat'em Like a Dishtowel (⌣́,⌣̀)⇝♥⇜(^◡^ ) [10w] "If I wring you out will you wring me back?"

"Perspective [10w] In every needle there's a haystack,if you step back."

"Murder [10w] Two coats of paint doen't get rid of a ghost."

"The Gypsy Jackpot An ambulance, a police car and a fire truck parked in front of a gypsy's trailer can only mean one thing ~ insurance scam!"

"Make It Happen!!! [10w] Don't wait for someone to fall in love with you."

"Hung [10w] Being caught with your pants down is a hanging offense."

"The Pompous Psychopomp Its your charge to provide me safe passage to the afterlife,to be a midwife to my dying.Any yet, you hover there, judging me,putting on airs, you supercilious whip-poor-will.You're an embarrassment to nightjars everywhere.Now do your fucking job and take me to hell ~which I guess has already begun,judging by your shitty escort service."

"Leaping lemmings! Leaping lemmings!I so adore ya'Can't get enoughJust want more’o'ya'!When I've had my fill'o'ya',I long for anotherRefill'o'ya.So, let's cut my spiel And here's the deal:I'm just gonna' haveta' cloneya'!So, when we're doneJust having fun --I'm just gonna' haveta' boneya'Again."

"Rewrite☷Rewrite [10w] Happiness writes new memories;New losses rewrite over old ones."

"Relatively Speaking [10w] The irony about 'relativism theories' is that they're relative too."

"Fodder for Poets [10w] Childhood memories are the most seminal sustenance for creating poetry."

"Deadlines The only deadline I plan on missing is the one at the cemetery."

"The Universe Begins and Ends in Us If a telescope could see beyond the edges of the universe,we would see ourselves looking into a telescope trying to see beyond the edges of universe."

"Metamorphosis [10w] Change. Become the butterfly.Don't stay a caterpillar with wings."

"Tortuguer Costa Rica Haiku Lora Sea TurtlesInvade to beach to lay eggs.Locals invade the eggs."

"Vacations for Souls [10w] When souls are bored in Heaven they vacation in Hell."

"Lady Gaga Haiku A cow has a big head, deep voice, a long tongue, butLady Gaga he's not."

"Vengeance, Thy Name is Woman Betrayed women aren't exactly vengeful,but they aren't exactly anything else."

"Death Has Bad Timing Death has bad timingbecause rigor mortis sets into your penisjust when you don't fucking need it."

"FBI vs. CIA When a person works for the FBI for 20 years and retires,he gets a watch.When a person works for the CIA for 20 years and retires,he gets watched.I know this not because I'm in law enforcement or with the NSA ~I know this because I have HBO."