#Suicide

"please=""hand=""me=""the=""remote,=""dear."=""[10w]=""The most effective method of birth control is grannie panties."

"When one realizes that his life is worthless he either commits suicide or travels."

"God is Great [10w] God found me in a dumpster and made me holy."

"Tofino, Canada Haiku Free flowing clothes,Strumming guitar on the beach.Still my baggage follows me."

"Closets Opening and Closing [10w] + [10w] You can take sweet gay men out of the closet;you can't take the closet out of the master-bedroom suite."

"Why Utopias Fail When you tie several horses together and one takes the lead, they all fall."

"Wishing Wells [10w] Wishes fall to the bottom of wells;only faith floats."

"Any way I slice reality it comes out poorly, and I feel an urge to not exist, something I have never felt before; and now here it comes with conviction, almost panic. I mentally bless and exonerate anyone who has kicked a chair out from beneath her or swallowed opium in large chunks. My mind has met their environment, here in the void. I understand perfectly."

"Pamela Anderson Haiku Ben Stillerbeds Pamela Anderson.My alarm clock rings"

"What Teenage Boys Do On Their Computer All Day [10w] ctrl alt delete ex-girlfriendcut paste Penelope Cruzpost Facebook"

"*"Maybe the whole point of my life is to make you feel more alive."

"Grass in a Sidewalk Crack Grass sprounting miraculously in a sidewalk crack is a metaphor forlousy maintenance."

"Read vs. Write If you want to know about life second hand, read;if you want to experience life directly, write."

"My Secret for Out-of-the-Box-Thinking To help me writein my signature out-of-the-box style,I sit in front of my humidifier that I've filled up with Grey Goose vodka.My humidifier is now at Underwriters Laboratoriesin a 12-Step Programand buddied up with a de-humidifier."

"United Negro College Fund: A mind is a terrible thing to waste... ...and so is your paycheck,so don't waste good money on a lost cause."

"Maintaining the Distance between Wealth and Poverty [10w] The nouveau riche are far more ruthlessthan the rich."

"Unruffled [10w] Nothing’s calmer than an unruffled duck eating a cool cucumber."

"Shakespeare vs. Keynesian Economics {Couplet} If 'Neither a lender nor a borrower be',investments would dry up, economies stagnate,and off to the poorhouse go you and me."

"New Year's Revolving Door [10w] + [10w] + {Couplet} 2015's revolution commences with the overthrow of New Year's resolution.Seek not absolutionfor our weak character's immune to evolution."

"Death as Opportunity [10w] Death's an opportunity to wisely fill the void it leaves."