#teachings

"2 Rules on Becoming a Good Poet [10w] Rule#1: Never write shitty poetry.Rule#2: Never forget Rule #1."

"Original Thoughts [10w] Original thoughts are not diminished by days, distance or disregard."

"The Albanian Art of Subtle Seduction [10w] "You have an amazing mind now show me your tits."

"I [10w] 'I' is a wellspring in the desertoverflowing with life."

"Facebook's New Marketing Slogan "We can only be lonesome together.900,000,000 served."

"Income Tax [10w] A man's income tax return measures his integrity and stupidity."

"New Year's Resolutions New Year's resolutions shouldn't be about doing new things;it should be about stopping to do the shitty things you're already doing."

"What's a Proper Tribute to Robin Williams? [10w] When funnymen die is to better to laugh or cry?"

"Mint Julep {Couplet} I've had more than a hint of a tulip or two,after treating them to a mint julep, or two."

"The 2-Step Self-Discovery Program The first step in self-discovery is not giving a shit what anybody else thinks.The second step is knowing you're a self-centered asshole."

"Pamela Anderson Haiku Ben Stillerbeds Pamela Anderson.My alarm clock rings"

"Ringtones Haiku 'Oy! Dai, da-ye-nu,Dai, da-ye-nu, Dai, da-ye-nu...'"Answer your fucking phone!"

"Coffee Wisdom New Yawk [6] You either pay me the five large nowor yoos can choosebetween the toilet plungeror the hot coffee enemaya fuckin jamook."

"The Bonds That Tie Weak bonding is sharing a common interest;strong bonding is sharing a common enemy."

"Grease [10w] Relationships between people are rarely frictionless;they all need grease."

"Compassion and Self-Neglect [10w] Compassionate people know how to care of everybody but themselves."

"Simply Fabulous Haiku If I write fablesam I a fabulist orsimply fabulous?"

"Thorny Love [10w] A thorn by any other name would hurt as much."

"Celebrity [10w] Celebrity seeking is like love or war: NO HOLDS BARRED."

"Selfies [10w] Selfies allows you instant gratification and reminiscence all at once."