More quotes by Jarod Kintz, $3.33

"Goodbyes, they often come in waves."
"The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn’t around to propose to her."
"I got a new car. I just need to put it together. They’re easier to steal piece by piece."
"Patience and wisdom walk hand in hand, like two one-armed lovers."
"I lost a little weight over the weekend. I cut my fingernails."