I have a 12:34 representational time dance. I do it at 3:33... - Jarod Kintz, At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

"I have a 12:34 representational time dance. I do it at 3:33 every other Tuesday (twice a day). If you’d like to participate in my choreographed dance routine, bring a football helmet and a half empty can of tuna (keeps the stray cats away, because I perform in a gritty, grimy downtown alley)."

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More quotes by Jarod Kintz, At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

"No matter how far or long you carry it, my love doesn’t weigh a lot. But if you aren’t carrying it with you, it will weigh heavy on your mind."
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"Do I own my soul, or would two of my clones?"
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"I saw him do a No More Potatoes Dance, after he saw me stuff the last of the mashed potatoes in my pocket."
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"Insider trading is a serious crime. Do you know what the penalty for doing it is? Nothing, if you’re a member of Congress."
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"When push comes to shove, I’m going to figure out that this door needs to be pulled to be opened."
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