More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Let’s do a 50-50 deal, with me getting 75% of the profits, and you getting the other half. That’s how we can both get the most value out of a relationship."
"We had a whirlwind romance. That’s what happens when you date a tornado. Hold on, I have to stop tweeting for a bit because Kansas keeps calling."
"If you want me, you’d better hurry. Act now, supplies are limited."
"There’s no reason to not be humble, because as great as you may be, you can always be greater."
"When it’s raining, instead of using an umbrella, try holding an empty drinking glass above your head. That’s exactly how I thirst for your love."