The way I wrestle five-year-olds makes me think if I were ev... - Jarod Kintz, $3.33
"The way I wrestle five-year-olds makes me think if I were ever attacked by a pack of midgets, I’d be OK."
More quotes by Jarod Kintz, $3.33
"I haven’t been feeling like myself lately. No, I’ve been feeling like my clone."
"A stationary bike is a device that epitomizes the phrase “hurry up and wait."
"I just recently figured out how mirrors work. Pretty cool. That guy always hungrily staring at my naked body was me!"
"I called an insurance company to get a quote. They gave me one of Oscar Wilde’s best."
"She asked if I wanted to spoon with her, and I told her I didn’t want to stir things up."