The way I wrestle five-year-olds makes me think if I were ev... - Jarod Kintz, $3.33
"The way I wrestle five-year-olds makes me think if I were ever attacked by a pack of midgets, I’d be OK."
More quotes by Jarod Kintz, $3.33
"Patience and wisdom walk hand in hand, like two one-armed lovers."
"I haven’t been feeling like myself lately. No, I’ve been feeling like my clone."
"I want to own a wind farm. Don’t breathe, or you’ll undermine the price of my crop."
"I just recently figured out how mirrors work. Pretty cool. That guy always hungrily staring at my naked body was me!"
"I lost a little weight over the weekend. I cut my fingernails."