#Knitting

"I know she is going on vacation, so I knitted her a sweater. It matches the bathing suit I knitted her, and it’s as revealing as my feelings for her."

"It’s me and you, or me and knitting. Don’t make me choose. Ugh, #love."

"I’ll stand by you. And by stand I mean cower in your shadow. It’s probably cold there, so I’m going to knit myself a warm cat sweater to wear."

"Since I became a knitting humor writer, I seem to be understood a little better - at least for the purposes of social discourse."

"Properly practiced, knitting soothes the troubled spirit, and it doesn't hurt the untroubled spirit either."

"Letting go is the lesson. Letting go is always the lesson. Have you ever noticed how much of our agony is all tied up with craving and loss?"

"She looked so sexy with her sixteen cats that I just had to swipe right, but when she messaged me first quoting Monty Python, I knew it was Tinder love. Maybe on the first date we’ll knit the blanket we’ll make love under."