#mastery

"Self-Help I asked the bookseller,'Do you have any self-help books for addiction?'He said,'If I tell you, I'd be enabling you."

"When in Doubt [10w] If your relationship becomes stagnant,set fire to her dress."

"Deadly Sex Haiku Each thrust of his cockwas another coffin nailhammered in my heart."

"Yams vs. Sweet Potatoes vs. Cassava vs. Popeye [10w] "I am that I am that I am a yam."

"Hidden [10w] A woman is an iceberg;we see less than 10%."

"Adult Pretend [10w] "I'm tired of playing 'pretend';let's play 'get-real, bitch."

"Measuring Love The only scientist who can measure love is the onewho's in love with another scientist."

"Schmuck [10w] + {Couplet} Show kindness to a schmuck,it's guaranteed you'll get fucked."

"There is nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. [10w] + {Couplet} Network TV's insistent stupidity to the Outer Limits pushes me."

"Extra Crispy Deranged Free Range Chickens "Hey, I may be delusional in believing you're delusional,but one thinks for sure, the person who bothers to read this shit is delusional."

"Proof Proof of God's existence is as silly as proof of love's."

"What Women Want [10w] What women want is a feeling of security with abs."

"Fat Bungee Jumpers When I watch a fat woman bungee jumpI swear I can feel the earth leaving its orbit."

"Grass in a Sidewalk Crack Grass sprounting miraculously in a sidewalk crack is a metaphor forlousy maintenance."

"Poetry vs. Prose [10w] Prose is the bread of imagination;poetry is the wine."

"but,=""soft!=""what=""light=""through=""yonder=""window=""breaks?"=""[10w]="""Shut the fuck up! I think we got a burglar."

"A Matter of Perspective I see rain dancing on the stage of the pond.Fish see heaven throwing a thousand kisses.My wife see a drizzle of olive oil on a pot of spaghetti. The scientist sees condensation and precipitation.The rain sees reincarnation.A poet see them all in permutation."

"Revel in the Unraveling Being authentic is lifting the maskon who you think you should be seen as,and becoming at ease with your bare ass vulnerability.Revel in the unraveling,take courage in sharing your imperfections,and you'llincrease your loveexponentially."

"Louisiana Dynamite Fishin' {10w] "Uncle Jimbo sez, if dey don't float it ain't fishin'."

"Fodder for Poets [10w] Childhood memories are the most seminal sustenance for creating poetry."