#positive-thinking

"If I Were God [10w] If I were God I'd sell my shit on Ebay."

"Regret vs. Good Times "If I had to regret the good times I spent with every lover who eventually disillusioned me,my love life would be reduced to ten seconds."

"Too Beautiful for Words [10w] + [10w] When nature presents us with miracles too beautiful for words,it is either a mountain, a beach, or a baby."

"Give up smoking cold turkey. Start a diet in the next 5 min. Accept that job right away. Life can be beautiful without planning!"

"Lotto If I won a million bucks in Lotto,I'd give it to Charity.Charity gives great head."

"Thoughts Become Things... Choose The Good Ones!"

"Premature Evacuation [10w] I've stopped all my relationships short,not unlike this poem."

"Missouri State Motto Salus populi suprema lex esto [16]If our chiggers don't getcha', Rush Limbaugh will."

"The Game Is Afoot God's buried eight jewels within my soul.Life's game is,'Remove each gem, yet find me whole.'The clue is,"Eight is one, and one is eight,no jewel's more precious,all equally great."

"Tangled [10w] Love becomes a tangle of roots submerged in common soil."

"Chlorophylia [10w] + {Couplet} Few things amaze as the paletteof the autumn blaze."

"Ruth Whither thou goest, I will go ~as long as it's to the mall.I heard Dillard's is having an 80% off sale!"

"Over [10w] It's never ever over because the fat lady can't sing."

"Definition of Haiku in Haiku Due to brevityyour lame observations seemdeeper than they are."

"The Refugee I packed my car with cash and valuablesand headed for the border.At the first checkpoint they took my cash.At the second they took my valuables.At the border they took my car and my shoes.I walked barefoot the last 100 feet to freedom,and was greeted with open arms by a person I didn't recognize.In time I discovered that strangerwas the me they could not take from me."

"The State of the World Attests to This: [10w] Common people are too easily manipulated or stupid to vote."

"What lies beneath the Semblance? What lies beneath the semblance.What lies beneath the semblance of lies.What lies beneath the semblance of lies!Lies lie beneath her semblance.Lies lie beneath her semblance.Lies, lies and more lies!"

"Deaf [10w] No man suffers deafness if he listens with his eyes."

"Narcissist, Assholes and Immunization Narcissists and assholes are immunized by their egos and sense of entitlement against the criticisms, grievances and resentments of others."

"Writer's Prayers That Don't Work "Lord, lead me from the banality of everyday life,to the gleaming one beneath the surface."