#positive-thoughts

"Natural Born Poets vs. Made Poets A natural born poet sees the future of poetry.A made poet clumsily imitates his vision."

"McDonald's I love and rescue stray dogs, duct tape Burger King crowns to their heads and set them loose in McDonald's."

"Scientology [10w] There's nothing more oppressive than the ignorance of foolish belief."

"Deaf [10w] No man suffers deafness if he listens with his eyes."

"Scientific Discovery [10w] The greatest scientific discoveries were madelooking at the overlooked."

"Office Depot: Taking Care of Business... ...with short breaks, bad management and no job advancement opportunities."

"Sweep the board with Cosmic Ordering Success."

"Lenny Bruce I'm going to be rich!I figured out how to get schlong-juice stains off of suede."

"Rhyme vs. Reason {Couplet} Do not try to make rhyme of reason,nor reason of rhyme;For the former's too systematic,the latter's too sublime."

"♀ Travelers vs. ♀ Tourists [10w] + [10w] Female travelers wear no makeup, stringy jewelry and Jesus sandals.Female travelers wear overcaked makeup, diamond jewelry and Gucci Booties."

"Black Hole The death of one great man makes the world seem empty;the death or three creates a back hole in the heart of humanity.In Memorium 2015B.B. KingOliver SacksNicholas Winton"

"Writer's Prayers That Don't Work "Lord, lead me from the banality of everyday life,to the gleaming one beneath the surface."

"Talking to Myself I used to talk to myself until myself criticized myself.Now I'm giving myself the silent treatment."

"Diet and Exorcise [10w] The most effective diet is hanging around with fat people."

"Love Poetry [10w] Love poetry is simply bleeding on the page with ink."

"Grave Dancing for Dummies {Couplet} They danced at my grave when I was buried at sea;with my haters drowned, I'm now totally free."

"No Planning for Death [10w] People put more planning into a weekend vacation than death."

"Child on a Swing Haiku Child screeches like birdas swing reaches for heaven.Stars fill his pocket."

"Taco Bell [10w] Taco Bell: Living proof you can shit where you eat."

"Self-Help I asked the bookseller,'Do you have any self-help books for addiction?'He said,'If I tell you, I'd be enabling you."