#sacred-teachings

"Virtual Reality [10w] The only thing better than reality is perfected virtual reality."

"Keep Your Day Job Bitch [10w] + {Couplet} If you've guessed that I'm blessed,augury ain't your strawberry."

"Sharia Justice [10w] Sharia justice is a lynch mob masquerading as Allah's will."

"Grass in a Sidewalk Crack Grass sprounting miraculously in a sidewalk crack is a metaphor forlousy maintenance."

"Suicide It's ironic that suicide, an act of cowardice,requires you overcome the all powerful instinct of self-preservation ~and thereby it's transformed into an act of bravery.On the other hand, the survivors would argue, an act of stupidity ~which many acts of bravery ultimately are."

"Unfriend Politeley Means"

"Pitter Patter I love to hear the pitter patter of little feet ~as they unsuccessfully struggle to break free of my choke hold."

"A-New-Year's-a-Comin' [10w] A new year is coming!Let's all make new mistakes!"

"Control [10w] Don't lose control by imagining you can control your lover."

"Life is like a game of chess.To win you have to make a move.Knowing which move to make comes with IN-SIGHTand knowledge, and by learning the lessons that areacculated along the way.We become each and every piece within the game called life!"

"Doldrums People who live in the doldrumscan't throw caution to the wind."

"Voodoo I'm phobic about pins and needles.Can I just stick a voodoo doll in the microwave?"

"Rat Trap Haiku 'Hmm, 12 by 13,4 by 9. Oy! You call thisrat trap an apartment?"

"Enough [10w] Enough's the only thing most people can't get enough of."

"The Pompous Psychopomp Its your charge to provide me safe passage to the afterlife,to be a midwife to my dying.Any yet, you hover there, judging me,putting on airs, you supercilious whip-poor-will.You're an embarrassment to nightjars everywhere.Now do your fucking job and take me to hell ~which I guess has already begun,judging by your shitty escort service."

"Free Lunch There's no such thing as a free lunch ~for people who haven't yet learned to beat the system ;)"

"Your Poem A poem is a waking dream.If your poem is shit,then it was a fucking nightmare."

"National Rifle Association Credo [10w] God gave us two hands to holdan assault rifle."

"Self-Sufficiency [10w] When God closes a door,buy a Sawzall from Home Depot."

"Unwitting Measure [10w] + {Couplet} "You I love and treasurein an equal, unwitting measure."