#sage-advice

"The Albanian Art of Subtle Seduction [10w] "You have an amazing mind now show me your tits."

"Oxford, England Haiku City shrouded in fogand within the blinding mist we found each other."

"The Jewish NOW There's no time like the present ~but in the future,who can say?"

"Thank You, Adobe [10w] Thanks to Photoshop,a picture isn't worth a single word."

"Fat Bungee Jumpers When I watch a fat woman bungee jumpI swear I can feel the earth leaving its orbit."

"Witticisms The greatest reward for coming up with some witty turn of phraseis that some day, if you're lucky,it may wind up in a fortune cookieat the very Chinese restaurant you're eating in!But if you get a big head about it,know it wasn't the flattery,it was the MSG."

"Enough [10w] Enough's the only thing most people can't get enough of."

"Ferdinand VII of Spain {Couplet} He who can false loyalty feignshall sit twice upon the throne of Spain."

"Idiots vs. Fools [10w] Idiots listen to other's bullshit;fools listen to their own."

"One Size Fits All Life Strategy Smile first.Ask questions later."

"Time Time waits for no man ~but for hot women Time makes exceptions."

"Schmuck [10w] + {Couplet} Show kindness to a schmuck,it's guaranteed you'll get fucked."

"2 Rules on Becoming a Good Poet [10w] Rule#1: Never write shitty poetry.Rule#2: Never forget Rule #1."

"Out to Lunch [10w] Behind closed doors, there's nothing we rightfully can call crazy."

"Royal Pricks [10w] Woe unto the king of his bubble who's a prick."

"Words of Wisdom [10w] Words of wisdom worth saying wouldfit on a T-shirt.@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@:::::@­:::::"

"Rat Trap Haiku 'Hmm, 12 by 13,4 by 9. Oy! You call thisrat trap an apartment?"

"Carrots and Creativity [10w] Put a carrot in front of you for optimal creativity."

"Cumin vs. Acumen Cumin is a powerful spice with a nutty peppery flavor;Acumen is more about having the good taste to knowhow and when to use it."

"Omnipresence Under The Christmas Tree "I wish I was a schizophrenic with déjà vu so I could've been everywhere simultaneously."